We Believe In You!
“I can’t do it,” my daughters would occasionally say about a school assignment. Frustration and anger and self-doubt would roil throughout our house.
Of course they could do the work—they always did—but in the moment, it was pointless to argue.
Instead I’d tell them it’s okay to feel that way. They didn’t have to have faith in themselves right then—I’d have enough faith in them for both of us. I’d hold onto the hope and optimism that they’d get through it until they were able to tackle the work.
As writers, we often struggle with having that faith in ourselves, so it helps to have someone—a family member, friend, book coach (hi!)—to have faith enough for both.
But it may not be obvious to them about how to support you.
A suggestion: write an affirmation on paper. Something like “I’m a great writer.” Or “I am persevering” or “I love my story ideas” or anything positive. Give a physical copy to your supporter. Then ask them, when they notice you’re in the depths of writing despair, to show you the paper. The affirmation is your faith in yourself—they’re literally holding onto it for you. You may not believe what you wrote in that dark moment, but that’s okay. Just because you have doubt doesn’t make the statement untrue.
Then, when you’ve validated your emotions, you can dive back in.
And be sure to write a new affirmation. 🙂